Calm now. No more death threats.

See? Total lack of swearing even. Alison, you can stop ducking behind the nearest wall when you see me.

I'm getting a new kitchen. If anyone ever destroys it again, I shall be very displeased.

Also? If anyone ever tries to kill my boyfriend again, displeased will not even begin to cover it. Fair warning for all the baddies out there. Line is drawn right there.